JULY 2005

Friday, July 1, 2005
tribute to mom
I would first like to thank mom for taking such good care of me the other night. I really do appreciate it! I truly believe you when you say you won't let anything bad happen to me if you can help it! My mom is an amazing person. Even though my mom is handicapped, and uses a wheelchair (which is SO much fun to play and ride on), she takes care of both of us, and provides for us, with little help. (She says we take care of each other!) I especially think mom takes good care of me, making sure all of my needs are met, and I have plenty of everything I need. She often puts me before herself. She is very independant, reliable, and a good mom. I just want everyone to know how proud I am of her and how much I love her! Love, Beau

Saturday, July 2, 2005
movie review: Cats & Dog
sMom watched (and I listened) to the movie Cats & Dogs. It is probably a cute and funny movie to child humans, but from a feline perspective I would have to give it a thumbs down. It potrays cats as evil and manipulative. I personally didn't appreciate being represented as evil and manipulative! Most cats are simply loving and affectionate. In the movie dogs are the good guy spy agents and cats are trying to overtake the world. The cats even enlist mice to be their soldiers. That in itself is unrealistic! The fact the dogs win over the cats is also not always true! It did have three redeeming qualities. The Russian (Blue, of course) cat was very intelligient. Also, the idea of cats overtaking the world is not necessarily a bad idea if done in a good way! Lastly, cats were listed first in the movie title which may mean the movie makers actually secretly liked cats, and we DID get first billing! You decide if you want to see it or not! Love, Beau

Sunday, July 3, 2005
What's In a Name?
Mom has completely lost it this time! I'm serious...she really has! We made a new cat friend who looks a lot like me, AND is also named Beauregard! To make matters even more confusing he also goes by Beau! So, mom decided it would be a good idea for me to have a secondary name. Since I am black and white (tux colors), she thought BeauTux was just absolutely funny and cute! (I hear you laughing out there, especially those laughing hysterically!) I was NOT amused! I do not think it sounds dignified to have a name that sounds like both Botox and buttocks. I think it's a good thing she likes Beau much better! If she starts calling me BeauTux I might have to scratch and or bite her. I wonder if cats are able to plead temporary insanity? When you go to church today, pray I don't attack her and she "holds thy tongue!" Love, Beau

Monday, July 4, 2005
Freedom
Happy 4th of July! Today is the day we celebrate our cat freedoms. The DeclarCATion of Independence starts: "When in the course of cat events ... We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all cats are created equal, that they are made by God with certain unchangeable rights, that among these are LIFE, Freedom, and the pursuit of Happiness." This means that we first have a right to life. Second (and third), this means that we have the freedom to choose to do whatever we want, whenever, and however we want. It also means that we can pursue whatever makes us happy and do whatever makes us happy! The ending states, "...we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor." This means we've got each other's back, we share our food and toys, and protect each other's honor. I'm proud to be an AmeriCAT.
God bless the Mew. S. A!! Love, Beau

Tuesday, July 5, 2005
the morning after
I hope all of my friends are okay from all the fiery, loud things last night. We had lots of them around here...both where we live and on the TV. Mom says the city we live in is rated #3 for best fireworks display in the United States! SO?! It was very hot here last night. I guess that's where the fire part comes in! Mom made sure I was going to be okay about all the bad noise and stuff last night. She gave me one of my chunks that helps keep me calm and even put a little catnip in my dinner last night. (Umm... catnip!) Grandpa said I must have had a slly grin on my face after all that! (Cats do NOT get silly grins on their face, except that Chehire guy!) I was just more a mellow fellow! Anyway, I survived it okay and I hope you did, too! Love, Beau

Wednesday, July 6, 2005
So shoe me!
I love playing with mom's shoes. First of all, the insides of them smell like her socks that I like playing with! They are also like a 3-in-1 toy. One game I like to play is to see how far I can stick my head inside the shoe. (This also allows me the opportunity to secretly take a big whiff to check all possible smells inside!). I also like to look as far down the shoe as I can to see if anything new or interesting is down there. The strings on the outside make WONDERFUL play toys. I can entertain myself for a long time with them! (I'm just not allowed to eat them, even though they taste good.) Lastly, they also make a great scratching pad! (This also allows you to leave your mark on them so other cats know it's YOUR mom!) I bet you have toys you have mutiple uses for, too! Love, Beau

Thursday, July 7, 2005
Oh where, oh where did the kitty go?
Mom has this big thing about rescuing. If she can rescue an animal she will! However, sometimes it makes me nervous about riding with her! There used to be a lot of cats running around here, but then mom found homes for most of them. She would put them in a carrier and then go for a long ride in the riding machine. When she got home, no more cat(s)! It makes me very nervous about going for a long ride with her! What if she decides to do the same with ME? I'm also hesitant to make friends with cats around because when I do mom seems to take most of them away! (This is VERY upsetting!) Mom assures me that she will NEVER get rid of me if it's her choice, and that it is okay to make cat friends, especially those with humans. I know mom loves me...but still I wonder...do I or don't I go riding? Please take care to watch someone's back today! Love, Beau

Friday, July 8, 2005
bugging out!
This morning I was playing with mom in the bed and she said, "don't let the bed bugs bite!" BUGS-we have BUGS...in our BED?!! When, how, and why did this happen? And why didn't anyone bother to tell me? Well, I thought I'd better get to work killing them, whatever they are. I didn't even know what I was looking for, and couldn't see anything. I just knew I had to do something to protect me and mom. So, I started slapping at the bed sheets hoping I was killing them. Later, mom explained to me that that was just a saying she heard when she was a child. (After I had done all that hard work!) I'm thinking twice about sleeping on our bed tonight! Be careful where you sleep! Love, Beau

Saturday, July 9, 2005
new toy
I have this new toy. It is a big ball made of lots and lots of string. But guess what? Mom said it's actually a DOG toy! She said she bought it because she thought I would like it. (A DOG toy?!) At first I was highly offended by this but then I got to thinking about it. It IS made out of string and cats love to play with string. It IS soft and fairly easy to handle! It also occured to me that those cats who have dog siblings made also have dog toys to play with as well. Okay, so I admit I did decide to give it a try...and it's actually an okay toy! I especially like to play with it when I'm going through my crazies! What I learned is it's okay to play wither other's toys. So share your toys! Love, Beau

Sunday, July 10, 2005
forgiveness
It's Sunday again, so time to get deep (like we shouldn't be that way anyway!). I have something to share of which I am ashamed. I am a sinful kitty. Yes, that's right. I sin! Yesterday I got spooked by mom's company because she had never been here before. Mom reached out to pet me to comfort me and I attacked her hand. I put a bad scratch and claw hole in it and it bled... BAD! (She also said it really hurt.) I spent yesterday looking after her. She kept telling me she loved me and that I was still a good boy. But after what I did (even though I didn't mean to), I'm not so sure she meant it. I even gave mom a head butt this morning to let her know how much I love her! I publically ask mom's forgiveness. I ask forgiveness of all my cat friends for not living up to standards. And may God forgive me! Love, Beau

Monday, July 11, 2005
"Raindrops keep falling..."
Sometime last night we started getting our share of the rain from hurricane Dennis. According to the weather guy, he said most of the rain is past us now but I just looked outside and I don't think so! It looks pretty wet and yucky to me! I think he's been looking at his pictures too much and not out the window! Mom says the rain is a good thing because we needed it." However, I am not as thrilled about it. I much prefer being able to lay next to the window and get SUN. Also, this means mom may not let me outside on my leash today. I shouldn't complain TOO much. Some kitties are in much worse right now! We need to think about those today! Love, Beau

Tuesday, July 12, 2005
bad morning (or "A Tale of Two Woes")
I should have stayed in bed and kept napping, but I didn't. That was a BIIIG mistake! As usual, I followed mom into the bathroom after having had a bite to eat. How does she show her appreciation? She sticks me in the bathtub with her and gets me soaking wet! NOT how I wanted to start MY day! Thanks a lot, mom! She said she THOUGHT she possibly saw a flea and had to be sure I was okay. You POSSIBLY THOUGHT? You weren't even sure? Jeez, mom! Look, if I had even one flea you would be the first person I would tell. Okay/! If all this wasn't bad and humiliating enough, she then thought she just had to try trimming my nails. She knows that always leads to war and she loses. What was she thinking??? Could this be considered cruel and unusual punishment? I ought to be glad she didn't decide to also do my dental treatment, too! I've had a rough morning. I think I'll go back to sleep. It's raining anyway! Be kind to animals! Love, Beau

Wednesday, July 13, 2005
my good deed
Mom said I was a very good and helpful kitty yesterday. That made me feel proud and good! We have a mail slot in our door. Sometimes when the mail person puts our mail in the slot it doesn't go all the way through. This was the case yesterday. Since I happened to be right there when it was put in, and since it normally lands on the floor making it mine, I decided to be helpful when it stayed there. I got up on my hind legs, put my fromt paws on the door for balance and support, and pulled the mail in with my teeth. Mom happened to see this and thought I was one special, smart kitty! I got lots of attention and thanks after that! It made my day! Praise is important! Love, Beau

Thursday, July 14, 2005
cat requests
It has come to my attention that some of my cat blogging friends are NOT getting their alloted computer time due to their humans. This is just not right! We are all taught to share as little ones. Some humans are not sharing! I think some of you are misunderstanding us. When we say, "Me-ews" what we are actually saying is, "Me use." I would like to respectfully request that everyone be given at least some computer time so they can get their blogs in. And, for those cats who still have trouble, I have suggested to them they do whatever it takes: laying across the keyboard, sitting in front of the picture thing, and or meowing a painful cry that sounds like something is seriously wrong with them. I hope this helps and please share! Love, Beau

Friday, July 15, 2005
"water, water everywhere...!"
Between this Dennis and Emily, we keep getting a lot of water falling from the sky. I know we aren't getting near as much as some people, and mom says we need the rain. But enough already! Mom is letting me out very little these days, so I'm not getting my fresh air, extra excercise, and my 20 minutes of sunshine someone once said we needed. Is this really healthy? Last night I almost got to go out on my leash. After she hooked me to my leash and opened the door, mom heard a thunder boom. She made me come right back inside. Phooey! There aren't even birdies to watch or listen to, or squirrels, right now! I've gone to taking extra long naps these days to pass the time! The up side is mom is staying home and playing with me more. I'm loving that! I guess there ARE two sides to everything (but I still wish I had a sunny day to be out)! Love, Beau

Saturday, July 16, 2005
"open sesame!"
My wet cat food stays in the refrigerator. I can hear the refrigerator open from anywhere in the condo. This amazes mom! It doesn't matter where in the condo I am, as soon as I hear the refrigeratior I am in her lap, and face, wondering where my food is! Sometimes I even stick my head inside to see what other goodies might be in there! I also like the cool air. (And people wonder why there are cat hairs in the inside bottom of the refrigerator sometimes! DUH!!) I don't know why mom is so amazed. Cats do have superior hearing to humans! (If I do say so myself!--But it's a true cat fact.) Besides what's important to me keeps me alert and my hears listening! One should always stay alert for what's important! Love, Beau

Sunday, July 17, 2005
A Tribute to Catnip (My 1st Poem! )
Oh catnip! My Catnip!
I do so love thee!
When I taste you or sniff you,
You set my mind free!
A taste or a whiff makes me so mellow
That when I have you,
I'm a much better fellow!
Oh catnip! My Catnip!
I will love you for all eternity!
*(Tomorrow-a new treatment for catnip addicts. Stayed tuned!)

Monday, July 18, 2005
12 Step Program for Catnippers Anonymous (CA)
Because I care about my friends, I have created Catnippers Anonymous and a 12 Step program for it. I hope it helps! Here are the 12 steps:
1. We admit to ourselves we have a catnip problem.
2. We admit we need help and only God can help us now!
3. Decide to try better self-control and figure out why we have this problem.
4. Join a feline support group and publicly admit we have a catnip problem.
5. We’re ready for God’s help and ask for it.
6. Take inventory of all the damage we did while on a binge.
7. Try to undo the damage and give headbutts, purrs, licks, and nudges to those affected.
8. The exception to this is if it would just make those affected more upset.
9. Continue first 8 steps and be prompt and quick about it!
10. Pray and or go into a Zen state if necessary. Search for God’s will.
11. Get knowledgeable about my catnip problem to better help me.
12. Having been enlightened, we attempt to help others with their catnip problem and, at the same time, continue working on myself using these steps.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005
I've got your back, mom!
Mom set the alarm this morning. She had things she needed to do today (like give me a tummy and chin rub, scratch behind my ears, feed me, and clean out my litter box). I was afraid she was going to do what she does sometimes and fall back asleep. SO, I took matters into my own paws. When she was halfway sitting up I moved into position behind her and laid down. I made sure she knew I was back there. (After all, I didn't want to be "bed kill" if she laid back down!) I backed my butt right up against her back. That way she couldn't lay back down! Once that worked, I nestled myself amongst the covers, making sure to thoroughly mess them up. MY job was done. She was up and after all my hard work I was ready for a nap! Have someone's back today! Love, Beau

Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Response to an Email Max received
My friend Max received an e-mail from someone who was returning their cat, that was less than a year old, to the POUND for the following reasons: a) the cat had not become a lap cat, b) the cat would not come out from under the bed and play with the laser light, c) it's poop smelled really bad, d) it was not FUN, and e) it wasn't what he expected. After becoming extremely upset and angry, mom and I got our composure back enough to also give this person our response (and we do hope that person sees this). First of all, taking an animal to the pound is the worst possible place you could take it! It is normally a quick kill shelter! There are many other safer places to take it where they will find it a new home. If you need a list, contact me. Also contact me and let me know WHERE you took it. If it's still there I will find a way (with help from friends) to find it a home. Second, LIFE is never what you expect. It's better, worse, or just different, but never what you expected. ALL poop is poopy! That's what Lysol/Oust is for! My cat isn't thrilled by my laser light either. Get over it! Not all cats are lap cats and they're not always fun. My cat has been challenging in a lot of ways, but I would never dream of getting rid of it just because of what he involves. I love him so much I would die protecting him! I hope you don't have human children! I can only come to the conclusion that you are immature, insensitive, irresponsible, lazy, misinformed, ignorant, uninformed, naive, stupid, or have psychological issues. Whatever the case, my ultimate Christian response is to pray for your soul and try very hard to forgive you SOMEDAY! As Jesus hung dying on the cross He said, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." This does not mean you get absolution. You will not find absolution anywhere. We are all responsible for the consequences of our actions. We all have to answer to God someday for what we have done/not done in our lives. I also pray God protects this cat and quickly finds a home for it. May God have mercy on your soul!--Beau

Thursday, July 21, 2005
Feeling puffy
I'm feeling pretty good, and a little "puffed up," about myself these days. A few nights ago a policeman came to our door looking for directions to another place. Since I didn't know him, I made sure he knew he was on MY territory. I growled and hissed at him the whole time mom was giving him directions. (Even though he seemed okay and was a policeman, I take no chances with ANYONE! After all, I am the man of the house and I have to protect mom and me. It's my job!) The policeman said I was a good guard cat! I thought that was a big compliment coming from someone doing his job! Someone suggested to mom about taking a self-defense course for handicapped people. They thought it would be good excercise, she would learn things, meet new people, and it would improve her confidence. She doesn't NEED self-defense. She has me! She just need to take me with her everywhere! (hehe!) Mom also says God protects and watches over her. We all need a protector and something that makes us feel good (even if it's ourselves)! Love, Beau

Friday, July 22, 2005
Life's Most Embarrassing Moments-Cat Edition
I hesitate to mention this for fear of putting ideas into our humans's heads. I was thinking how embarrasing it would be if adults took pictures of our 1sts like they do with their human young. I mean think about it!--Our first time we poop in the litter box after training, First time we wash our own selves, first time we cough up a hairball, get a physical and our shots. You get the idea! What I think would even be worse is if they decided to get pictures of our major life events: having our manhood taken, a female giving birth (I hear some humans actually do this-YUCK), or the first time we attack the vet for attacking us! (Mom actually took a vet picture once.) I'm glad to be feline, not human. And I'm glad mom didn't go this picture crazy! Love, Beau

Saturday, July 23, 2005
World Largest Hairball!
Today on our noon show that we watch there was someone from a place called Ripley's Believe it or Not. He had what he said was the world's largest hairball, and I can believe it! This hairball came from a COW and weighed 10 1/2 lbs.! It was discovered when this cow died. They said this huge bump was in it's side so they did surgery on it and found it. Even IF I was a bigger animal like a cow, if I had something like THAT inside of me I think I would explode! I don't see how the cow stood it! No wonder it died! I didn't even know cows got hairballs! Just the thought makes me want to cough! I guess you learn something new everyday, which is good even if it's painful and gross! Love, Beau

Sunday, July 24, 2005
Judge not...
Musette has a blog about the world's ugliest dog winner. (here's a picture of Sam.) If you look at the picture, be prepared to be startled. I admit it I thought it too when I saw it. However, mom reminded me that to God even he is beautiful and is one of God's creatures. After all, beauty is only skin deep and in the eyes of the beholder. He probably has a wonderful personality and is very loving! Mom is handicapped and has been judged because of it most of her life. But, all of us, whether animals or humans, have been judged in one way or another. That's just wrong! So, the next time you start to make a judgment about another human or pet, DON'T! Think of them as one of God"s creatures instead. Love, Beau

Monday, July 25, 2005
helping out
While mom was gone to church yesterday I decided to do some of my share of the chores and help a LITTLE. The new trash bag for the can had fallen to the floor, so while mom was gone I moved it from over by the shelves to next to the trash can. I figured that was HER reward for being trained so well. I have trained her to get me some fresh water everytime she gets her some, from the running water. (I just hope she doesn't expect a reward every time now because it's not going to happen!) She was so impressed with what I did that she called Grandpa and Momma S, Ms. Mary, and the foster friend about it! This may have been a mistake. She may expect more out of me now! I think I'll sleep all day today and think about that! Must balance...must balance...! Love, Beau

Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Crazed
It was going to happen! After all I had been stuck inside way too long! And with all the rain and storms, there weren't as many birdies to watch outside. I went through my criazies ALL DAY yesterday. (Well, most of it anyway!-Anyone who knows anything about science knows when you bundle energy when t's released it goes wild!) I have to say it felt really good to do all that running yesterday! It felt so good I just kept doing it! Mom said watching me made her feel tired. She also told me it was because I was "stir crazy." First of all, I can't stir things with my thumb problem.. And, for the record, I am NOT crazy! Of ourse, afterwards I took a nice long nap. Excerise is good, but so are naps! Love, Beau

Wednesday, July 27, 2005
shredder
I just had to do it! This heat wave is lasting FOREVER (it seems) and mom won't let me out so I got real frustrated! So, to take out my frustrations, I shredded the small neighborhood paper that came in the mail today. Nope-mom never got to read it first! First, she was upset about it but then when she saw how much fun I was having with the paper-shreeding, attacking, pouncing, and sliding on it,-she just watched and enjoyed it. It was lots of fun! By the way, mom did get a picture of my "Beau-destrucion!" I will get posted as soon as we can. I hope you find something fun to do today! Love, Beau

Thursday, July 28, 2005
Discrimination against cats!
My friend, Dee, and I have been talking abou the fact that there are no cat parks, despite all the dog parks. This is discrimination and NOT fair! There should be cat parks as well! Dee and I have been brainstorming and we think there should be parks for both dogs and cats combined. One side for cats and one side for dogs. I thought the cat side should have climbing towers and tunnels, and lots of fun cat toys. In a private corner, there would be a giant sandbox for a litter box. I also thought there should be a catnip garden, but Dee didn't seem too sure about that. I think he thought catnip "junkies" hanging around the park might bring in a bad crowd. I thought it just might help us relax and be more active. Anyway, something to think about starting in YOUR area! Find a cause to fight for today! Love, Beau

Friday, July 29, 2005
The Birds
I finally got to go outside yesterday (picture bottom right) and as soon as mom opened the door to let me go out I saw two bird looking for worms up the walk. I got so excited I could hardly contain myself! My body and tail were quivering and my mouth was chattering! I was having trouble standing still long enough for mom to put my leash on! Then, just as she was letting me out the door on my leash, another bird flew right by my head! At first it startled me, but then I got even more excited! Unfortunately, my leash wasn't long enough to get to them.. It didn't matter anyway because they flew off when they saw me headed right for them! I sure did enjoy the birds though! I hope you find something that excites you, today! Love, Beau

Saturday, July 30, 2005
"Nobody knows the trouble I've seen...!"
Well, I'm running very late today blogging anything. Mom's printer quit and grandpa had to take it back and get a new one. In the meantime, everything was disconnected enough to where I couldn't get in and do anything. Mom and I both got frustrated but it happens to everybody at one time or another! Mom and I handled the situation very differently. Mom ran errands and went to the store. I decided since I couldn't do anything I would try taking a nap! (It's hard to do around here on Saturdays. There are lots of people coming and going in this complex, and it can get noisy!) So, who do you think handled it better-the cat taking it easy or the human rushing around anyway?! I would very much like to thank Grandpa for helping us, despite his busy schedule! We greatly appreciate it! Don't let things get you down when things go wrong and just try hanging loose for a while! Love, Beau

Sunday, July 31, 2005
Chillin'!
There's a drink called Coke and they have a commercial that people singing say, "I'd like to teach the world to chill...." Mom says it used to say they like to teach the world to sing. So, what does that say about humans today with all that is going on in the world? And that it is so obvious even these Coke people see it? Are humans, unlike us, losing sight of what's important and worrying too much? I hope not because we need them and rely on them to take care of us. I see how stressed mom can get at times! I think humans could learn a thing or two about chilling from cats! We don't just take an afternoon nap, we take frequent naps! And we "chill" as long as someone doesn't bother us while we're napping or eating, or tries to trim our nails, give us a bath, or take us to the vet. Cats should and could teach classes! Everything you need to know you could learn from your cat! It's already a proven fact having a pet lower's a human's blood pressure! We're not just cute and loveable, we're a medical necessity! So, keep us arround (and chill)! We're good for your health! Love, Beau